Are you fearful of making a blunder
at your first parent meeting? Do you quake in your jazz shoes
to think about a meeting with your building principal? Are you
looking for a drill team parent to be your back up at the next
parent meeting when you meet with confrontation? Even though there
are different variables for every decision you make as a director,
there are some basic guidelines of etiquette to use when dealing
with parents, school administrators, businesses and your students.
Hind sight being 20/20, I wish that
I could go back and retrace my steps as a beginning director.
I was new and very eager as a college graduate and felt very confident
that I knew the exact formula to be the perfect drill team director.
Let's see...
- Do not ever talk to parents unless
you cannot avoid them at the grocery store, except the parents
that have lots of money and have you over for dinner.
- Ask the officers opinion on every
decision you make because you will always be popular with them
because they will like the outcome.
- Tell your team that you are breaking
traditions and doing things the way you did it in high school.
- Order all of these wonderful props
and costumes without ever preparing a budget.
- Avoid documenting student or parent
confrontations or you might be caught by the principal.
Luckily, most of the above was fictional,
but every new director is faced with a multitude of daily decisions
and must think quickly and wisely as to the best method to handle
the outcome.
First, and foremost, never be afraid
of admitting a mistake. Because I was so young, I was terrified
that everyone just assumed that I was inexperienced and was looking
for me to make a mistake. I soon found that if I faced up to my
mistake, whether with my administrators, the parents or students,
I could put the issue behind me and be ready to go on. Sometimes
we are so side tracked with trying to defend our honor as an independent
woman that we get mired into the quicksand and unable to function
in other areas.
Next, document . . . document . . .
document. You can never keep too many records. Remember to keep
all of your documentation organized so you can find the proper
references when dealing with a problem.
Never be afraid to ask your school administrators
for advice on areas that you are not sure of the answers. This
will help you avoid getting into a difficult situation. When your
administrator advises you on something and you disagree, make
sure to not take the defensive and go through the issues in a
diplomatic manner to achieve the best response. Remember that
many administrators are possibly going through similar anxiety
if they are new and may be trying to over respond to your problems.
You can always achieve more with your administrators by using
kind, effective words than to react in a negative way.
When dealing with parents, the best
advice I can offer is to be very prepared and organized. Many
parents like to show their authority by catching you in a mistake.
If you are caught off guard, never give a response that is not
thought out properly. The best answer to give a drill team mom
in the grocery store if she pins you down about why her daughter
didn't make the routine last week, ask if she could kindly call
you at school during your conference hour so that you can have
your paperwork in front of you to better answer her questions.
I made the mistake of getting very close
to some of the parents. It was great on Friday afternoons when
I stayed after school before the game. They would always have
me over for dinner and speak so supportive of my program. It was
bliss until their daughter didn't make officer. Friendship evidently
came with a price tag.
When you come into a program that has
been well established, there is most likely still room for improvement.
But, remember that your transition can be best compared to a divorce
and you are the new stepmother coming in with new rules and new
ideas that will change their happy little family. Be sensitive
to their special traditions. Give yourself time to learn about
all of their past problems as well as being truly interested in
their uniqueness. Find out what makes them proud to be a team
member. Be a good listener. Never allow yourself to get too close
to the students nor forget that they are depending on you as their
adult leader. They have plenty of friends that are their peers.
You need to be more of a mentor to them. Change must come slowly
and after you have had the chance to win their confidence.
You can win their confidence with granting
respect to them. Some directors tend to be a 'control freak.'
Given the opportunity to be in charge of a group that is much
younger, they work on the fear factor and talk tersely to their
students. This will eventually cause your program to crumble.
- Do not show favoritism to certain
students and always speak to your students with respect.
- Be firm, fair and consistent.
- Never be afraid to learn.
- It is important to know where your
weaknesses lie and be able to build knowledge and confidence in
those areas.
- Ask questions of those more experienced.
- Seek a mentor for yourself.
- Learn to get past your ego and accept
others for the way they are.
Look past the immediate situation to
the end result. There are many ways to achieve the same results
and each dance/drill team program has their own unique methods
that work in their situation.
That is probably good advice for all
of us, whether we are new or experienced directors.
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